It never ceases to amaze me that even the kind of fluffy snow I find impossible to form into solid snowballs manages to attach itself to Ella’s nether-regions and start a snowball colony.

I think I've discovered a natural alternative to Icy Hot for the groin area.

Several snowball colonies, in fact. I’ve never seen communities get built so quickly. And talk about rapid community expansion… it doesn’t take long before Ella can barely walk due to snowball overcrowding.

I feel like I'm waddling. Can you tell that I'm waddling?

There’s something really demonic and parasitic about this snow.

Hey, what's in these balls? I'm startin' to feel pretty good!

Don’t even bother to give one  of those balls a tug because it won’t do any good. It’s not coming off. And when you get home, you’ll spend 45 minutes pouring hot water all over them to try to get them to melt – to no avail. All-weather balls of steel, I’m telling you.

There have been times I looked up at Ella and gasped, “My God! the balls are overtaking her!”

The snow says I'm the chosen one, mommy.

Mommy? Is that you? Everything's going white.

My theory is that, after years of getting pissed on, the snow has decided it’s had enough. Somewhere in Central Park, there’s a rally headed up by a few yellow snowman, inciting the other flakes to ban together to get to the dogs before the dogs get to them.

I suspect the yellow and otherwise, ahem, soiled ringleaders are also responsible for the evil hidden messages we discovered that had been left on the trees. Like this one, for example:

Riddle me piss.

The interpretation on that one isn’t entirely clear. This next one is more straight forward:

To be clear, the yellow snow is mad.

Watch out for the balls, that’s all I’m saying. In fact, you might want to get your dog a bodysuit for protection.

This suit of armor looks pretty menacing, too (c/o dvice.com). It might work.

Protect your dog against unwanted snowball colonization with this suit of armor

Ella is SUCH a movie buff. She drags me to all the famous filming sites throughout Manhattan. It’s clear she has stars in her eyes.

You have no idea how much she wishes she could have played the role of the dog in Kate & Leopold…and not just because she’d have gotten to work alongside the talented and charming Hugh Jackman. She’s got more depth than that – or at least she thinks she’s got the acting chops to convince you she does

And who wasn’t affected by that scene in Woody Allen’s Manhattan (forward to 5:50) when Isaac (Woody Allen) and Mary (Diane Keaton) sit chatting on a bench along the East River, staring in the distance at the dimly lit 59th Street Bridge in the wee hours before dawn. See, here again…a dachshund? Granted Diane Keaton’s character could not easily have carried Ella into the diner while waiting for her food, but I’m sure Woody could have written some sort of alternate scene to accommodate her.

In any case, Ella was feeling nostalgic and convinced me to grab my camera and head down the East River Walk where we both got our 59th Street Bridge fix and Ella got a couple more shots for her portfolio.

"I'm in black and white. Aren't I artsy?"

"The only risk you run in casting me...and I say this humbly...is that I may upstage my surroundings."

It’s the end of April, which means I’m finally getting around to posting photos from winter! Bear with me, folks…

I’d love to be able to take credit for building this big hunk of a snowman, but I don’t have the cold tolerance and step ladder necessary to pull it off. I don’t know who built him, but a passerby told me that somebody on the block reincarnates him every year. I don’t know how I’ve never managed to see him before this year. He’s kinda hard to miss, let’s face it. His abs and bulging biceps did not impress Ella, however. Apparently she takes after her mom because I have never gone for the beefcake type either. She agreed to pose for a photo if I handed over my glove. Nothing for free in this world, I tell you.

"Your abs can't compete with the faux leather in my mouth."

Aren't my eyebrows manly?

Contrary to appearances, I haven’t forgotten that the internet exists. Life got hectic (as life sometimes does) and blogging and social networking…well…who can justify being social when life is so…hectic?!?!

But, never fear because Ella has convinced her furmother that she should really stop being such a control freak and learn to delegate. And so, I have acquiesced and given Ella a promotion. As if Ella didn’t run things ’round here before, now she does it “officially”. Here she is, hard at work laying out the editorial calendar for the blog for the next month. Just look how handy she is with a sharpie.

So, if I were you, I’d stay tuned because she’s likely got some pretty great stuff planned. If there’s one thing Ella knows, it’s how to entertain.

Today was easily one of the nicest days I have ever seen in New York City. After a miserably rainy day yesterday, the sun came out and brought the gorgeous autumn weather with it. Central Park in autumn is rivaled only by Central Park in springtime. My allergies respond equally to both, unfortunately. So my eyes are swollen and itchy…at least I could see well enough to get some good photos.

Ella and I took a sunset walk around The Reservoir, and here are some of the winning shots from the evening… (click on the photos to enlarge them)

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